Have you ever returned to the parking lot find your vehicle inaccessible because some dingleberry has decided to park six inches from your car door? Of course you have, and what did you do? You probably entered through the passenger's side, tucked your tail between your legs and drove off defeated because you didn't have the nerve to wait and confront that faceless ignoramus who had no idea what those slanted parrallel lines mean anyway.

Come on! That's no way to handle this kind of situation. In the past if you wanted to make the offending parker aware of your feelings, you had to wait for them to return and then risk the chance of getting your butt kicked. No more. Now you can savor that anger until you get home, taking your own sweet time getting in touch with your dark side by composing a heart-felt citation especially for dipsquats who can't park! That's right! And the great thing is that they'll never know who you are!